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A waste of perfectly good vinyl that could have gone into the production of inflatable stewardesses, the Bloodhound Gang's One Censored Beer Coaster quickly dispels the notion that record company's executive positions are filled entirely with dropouts from the "port-a-john" cleaning academy. The decision-makers at Geffen at least had the wisdom to not release the two tracks on this seven inch on the Bloodhound Gang's full-length album, opting instead to attempt to lose them in the world of vinyl obscurity. One side contains a disjointed compilation of answering machine messages, toilet flushing and bodily noises. The other contains a middle-school mentality ditty replete with sufficient racial slurs to leave Marge Schott blushing. Either side will leave you wishing you'd chosen something less cacophonous and musically repellent to listen to. Such as a Siamese cat stuck in a blender. Stuck in a microwave.
-"Evil" Jared Hasselhoff-
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PRO
I love these guys! The Bloodhound Gang (or, as my friends and I call them, BHG) can do no wrong. One Censored Beer Coaster should be called One Brilliant Beer Coaster. That's how good it is. The ultra-racist song on side one should have been on their One Fierce Beer Coaster album, but the scaredy-cats at Geffen wussed out and so the BHG were relegated to releasing this masterpeice on vinyl only. Too bad, too because it would have been huge on the international market.
The second side of this 7" has a collection of perfectly peiced together samples of strange and unusual sounds and speeches. It reminds me of letting someone else tune my radio with the speed of a negative Superman. Like Bizzaro or something.
If you like the BHG as much as I do, you'd better find a copy of this somewhere and buy it and listen to it. Actually, you should buy two copies because you'll probably wear this one out.
-Django Bohren-
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